Little things that make me angry...

"Seje" (seja), "esteje" (esteja), "your" (you are)

2011-11-08T12:38:00.003-02:00

OK. This might be a little thing, but it really makes me angry. People who don't write correctly. OK, English is NOT my first language and I know I make some mistakes here and there. Portuguese (Brazilian) is my mother tongue and I try my best to write it the best way I can.

So, please, don't write (or say) "seje", "esteje"... And "agente" is an agent; "a gente" means "we", but the verb is conjugated in the singular form. And "a fim" ('in order to') is composed by TWO words.

Also please pay attention to the word "hipocrisia": it is NOT "hipocrEsia".

Telcos Customer Support

2010-10-30T01:41:00.004-02:00

Quick post for you guys. Sorry, this is in PTBR, but I'll provide you an EN translation after the transcription. To make a long story short, I recently bought a 32GB iPhone 4 here in Brazil for an outrageous price of BRL 899.00 (approximately USD 530) with a one-year contract with Claro. For the last 4 weeks, I've been trying to activate the "Facetime" feature on the phone, to no avail. Called the customer support at least 10 times and was never able to get proper support on the phone. Today I tried the "online chat" support line. This is what happened:

(30/10/2010 01:30:26) Ludmila R

Sr(a). Ricardo, bem-vindo ao Atendimento on-line da Claro. Em que posso ajudar?

Mr. Ricardo, welcome to the Claro online support. How can I help you?

(30/10/2010 01:30:47) Ricardo

Olá. Gostaria de ativar o Facetime no meu iPhone 4. Poderia ajudar-me?

Hi. I would like to activate Facetime on my iPhone 4. Would you help me?

(30/10/2010 01:31:06) Ludmila R

O número do celular informado anteriormente é o mesmo para o qual deseja informações?

The phone number supplied is the same you would like to activate?

(30/10/2010 01:31:19) Ricardo

sim, o mesmo.

yes, that's correct.

(30/10/2010 01:32:25) Ricardo

xx-xxxx-xxxx

(30/10/2010 01:32:36) Ludmila R

Este atendimento gerou o número de protocolo xxxxxxxxxx que também será encaminhado por torpedo em até 24h. Peço, por gentileza, que responda as mensagens enviadas por mim em até 03 minutos, evitando uma desconexão automática.

This call generated a support ticket numbered xxxxxxxxxx that will also be sent via text message in up to 24h. Please answer all questions in less than 3 minutes to avoid automatic disconnections.

(30/10/2010 01:32:50) Ricardo

ok.

(30/10/2010 01:34:17) Ludmila R

Senhor Ricardo, em seu estado : Instabilidade na ativação da função FaceTime no aparelho iPhone 4

Mr. Ricardo, in your state: Instability on the Facetime function activation for the iPhone 4 handset.

(30/10/2010 01:34:47) Ricardo

Essa situação é temporária? Faz muito tempo que tento ativar o Facetime e até agora não consegui...

Is this a temporary situation? I've been trying to activate Facetime for a long time and have not been able to, so far...

NOTE: In my state, right? I am in São Paulo, if I go to Rio and try to activate Facetime will I succeed? I don't think so...

(30/10/2010 01:35:15) Ludmila R

Período da Anormalidade:
Início: 21/09/2010 18:00.
Previsão: Sem previsão.

Anomaly period:
Started: 21-Sep-2010 18:00
Solution: No expected date.

NOTE: 21st of September was the date when the iPhone 4 was first made available on Claro.

(30/10/2010 01:35:38) Ricardo

Ah, ok... "Instabilidade" nesse caso seria então "ainda não funciona"?

Oh, I see... So, does "Instability" in this case mean "It doesn't work yet"?

(30/10/2010 01:36:49) Ricardo

(30/10/2010 01:37:53) Ricardo

Aguardando resposta...

Waiting for an answer...

(30/10/2010 01:39:19) Ricardo

(30/10/2010 01:40:03) Ludmila R

Sr. Ricardo, já temos uma equipe tratando a falha junto a operadora internacional que faz a ativação da função. Pedimos desculpas pelo transtorno e agradeço a sua compreensão. Bom Dia!"

Mr. Ricardo, we have a team working on the issue alongside the international operator that does the activation of this feature. We apologize for the trouble and thank you for your understanding. Have a nice day!

(30/10/2010 01:40:47) Ricardo

E não tem nenhuma previsão, mesmo depois de um mês de "instabilidade"?

But isn't there an expected date, even after a month of "instability"?

(30/10/2010 01:41:10) Ludmila R

Previsão: Sem previsão

No expected date.

(30/10/2010 01:41:24) Ricardo

Ok. Muito obrigado. Bom dia!

Ok. Thanks a lot. Have a nice day!

Well, at least now I know what's going on and that it is not my iPhone's fault. Thanks, Ludmila R! Humpf!

Taking my medicines

2010-07-27T21:47:00.004-03:00

First of all, I am NOT an hypochondriac. I have diabetes type II. And that is it.

However, I take two prescription drugs, one multivitamin complex, a D-complex vitamin and fish oil daily.

The prescription drugs are related to the diabetes.

The vitamins are related to the fact that I was born in Brazil and now I am living in New England area. This means that my body was used to a different environment and now it must receive some aid from vitamins to keep it healthy.

And because the doctors were worried about my eating habits here in the US, they prescribed me some fish oil (i.e. omega-3 complex) to avoid heart problems and so on.

In the end, I take FIVE different tablets once a day, everyday in the morning during the breakfast, and I am only 33 years old!!!

Taking all those medicines everyday sometimes makes me angry.

Trash in the public transportation

2010-03-05T18:59:00.006-03:00

Every business day I take the commuter rail (train) and the T (subway) here in Massachusetts to go to the University and also to go back home.

I do not know if my standards/offsets have changed (mainly because I haven't used São Paulo public transportation system that much), but in any case sometimes there is some trash inside the train or T car and this kind of thing really makes me angry. Plastic bottles, soda cans, Dunkin' Donuts cups and newspapers are the most usual trash that you can find.

I think newspapers (mainly those Metro News stuff) are in the top of the list of trash in the public transportation. But actually I have seen some people taking the newspaper from the seats to read it and then they took it away. However, sometimes the newspapers just pile up in some place and I personally don't have the guts to take them to the trash (uuugh!). Mainly during the winter, when the cars' floors are always wet and the newspapers absorb the water creating a really disgusting mix of wet paper with some dirt.

This is a little fact that makes me angry nowadays.

Dial *6 for Private Calls

2009-08-19T23:04:00.003-03:00

Take a look at the sticker they've just attached to my extension at work...

"For private calls, dial *6"

There is an automated billing system at the phone system installed at the company I work for. To make private calls, you first dial *6 and then the number you want to call. If you are going to make a business call, dial *9 and then the number you want to call. At the end of the month, all your private calls are deducted directly from your paycheck. I think it is a fair rule. I normally use my personal mobile phone for private calls so I don't think too much to make a call, I normally just dial *9, because they are all business-related calls.

But then they put this sticker on the phone. That small piece of paper pisses me off and is now part of my daily life... This is one clear example of how to tell the difference between "Information" and "Intimidation". I would be PERFECTLY okay if the sticker said "Dial *6 for private calls; Dial *9 for business calls". That would be an informative sticker. But it doesn't.

Shouldn't the automatic payment be AUTOMATIC?

2009-06-18T19:08:00.008-03:00

Okay. Two things that made me angry TODAY and AT THE SAME TIME!

Here in the US they also have the automatic debt payment. You can put your utilities, internet and cable TV provider, telephone (including mobiles), credit cards bills and even your rental to be paid automatically via checking account (or even via credit card sometimes).

AT&T Wireless Prepaid Cell Phone Automatic-refill

When I was in Brazil, I had a prepaid cell phone and sometimes I forgot to put credits on it and my wife always complained about that because she was unable to reach me. Fair enough.

Here in the US I have a prepaid cell phone and AT&T provides the Automatic-Refill service. You can choose some options at the Automatic-Refill service like "once in a week", "twice in a week", "once in a month", "twice in a month" and "when you run out of minutes". And then you can choose how much credit you want varying from US$15.00 to US$100.00 (note: US$15.00 expires in 30 days and US$20.00 expires in 90 days).

As I am scarcely using the cell phone (less than US$75.00 in 6 months, i.e. less than US$13.00/month!!!), I thought that it would be nice to have added US$20.00 whenever I run out of minutes and so I subscribed to it.

Then today my credits ran down to US$0.14 and with such credit I can't place nor receive any call. Fair enough. However the US$0.14 can be used DURING a conversation, so for AT&T I still have minutes to talk and because of that they didn't refilled my credits automatically! This is a CATCH 22 because I am not able to place or receive ANY call with US$0.14!!

After realizing that, I just canceled my subscription to that service and refilled the credits by myself.

RCN (Internet and Cable TV provider) Automatic Bill Payment

Because of this issue, I went online to check the NSTAR utility and RCN bills. NSTAR was fine, being debted accordingly. When I was checking RCN, I have realized that they were billing me more than twice the usual. And it comes that the automatic payment didn't happen last month!!! You see, there was one previous automatic payment for April and it was done correctly. But the automatic payment for May just didn't happen!!!

Now I have sent an e-mail to the Customer Services in order to check what happened and probably I shall make the payment manually every month in order to be sure that such thing doesn't happen again.

For goodness sake, this is not a Third-World country!!! Things should be easier here in the US...

Those things really make me angry...

They forward your credit card data to a scammer

2009-06-16T09:40:00.007-03:00

Scammers really makes me angry. OK, maybe scams are not a 'little thing', but they deserve to be mentioned once they really make me angry.

When I checked my credit card transactions history some days ago I noticed a strange US$12.00 (twelve dollars) debt related to some "Complete Savings" company.

While researching through the Web, I discovered that such amount was charged by this "Complete Savings" website. I remember to have subscribed myself to that site after having acquired something via Internet at some web store. At the end of the transaction you were ALLOWED to subscribe to such website in order to receive some small discount coupons. Since the "Customer Savings" stuff was linked directly to the 'reliable' web store so I thought it was OK to register my e-mail to receive some information about discounts and also to collect points somewhere to exchange for some discount coupons.

Until then, the site didn't mention any fees once it was related to some purchase at 'reliable' store. That is the catch. It IS NOT FREE!!! All the charge information is written in the almost-infinite-with-small-letters TOS (Term of Service).

The problem is that I DIDN'T PROVIDE my credit card number to "Complete Savings" website! This means that someone DID FORWARD those info to them.

There are many complaints regarding this issue at this site, and it seems that this scam cannot be controlled by the 'reliable' web sites once the page is generated automatically.

This really makes me angry...

The switching lanes issue

2009-06-14T00:01:00.008-03:00

There is always something about changing lanes.

My small experience here in the Greater Boston Area shows me that changing lanes are quite rare. In this region they only change lanes when extremely necessary and in most of the cases they do the appropriate signaling. And when they do not make the signaling, they try to ensure that they are making a safe move. Maybe this behavior is imposed by the winter times, i.e., the snow and roads slippery condition. And driving here really makes me feel comfortable.

Back in Brazil, mainly in highways you always witness some car sliding all of a sudden from one lane to another, barely avoiding the other cars that surround it. The driver simply decide to put his car in front of yours and push it against your car. This is one of the switching lanes issue that makes me angry: not signaling appropriately and creating hazardous conditions for other people.

Another issue regarding changing lanes occurs when I want to make the move and some 'motoboy' (it is the modern version of the old office boy or delivery boy who now uses a motorcycle as transportation) begins to desperately push the button of his motorcycle buzzer.

Those 'motoboys' are like an horde of barbarians riding between lanes in São Paulo city. Yes, you read it right: I said they ride BETWEEN LANES right on the lane strips, zigzaging between the cars mirrors. They don't respect anything and they always think that they are always right. And if you try to change lanes, no matter how far ahead you are from them, they will begin to buzz just trying to avoid you to change lanes.

Are You Trying to Fool Me?

2009-06-05T13:14:00.002-03:00

Okay, there's been a long, long time since my last post. I am sorry, I have been a little bit lazy lately. But now I am a couple of days out of the office and thought it would be a good idea to drop a few lines to LTTMMA.

This time, I remembered how much people trying to make me a fool annoys me. Unfortunately, seems to me that this happens everywhere and from all kinds of people and corporations. They whether think we are all stupid or they are stupid themselves to imagine that no one would be able to identify that they are trying to fool everybody.

"Man, what are you talking about?" you would ask. Okay, I can think of some examples, as I always do, to explain what lies inside my sick brain. They are all examples from recent experiences and are all related to large corporations. But I am sure you readers will be able to connect them to your own experiences and to some individuals' actions as well.

Toothpaste - The first situation I can remember is the famous toothpaste tube case. I was told this story a couple of years ago and tried to find some references on the Interweb but wasn't able to find many. I am sorry. Well, to make a long story short, this major toothpaste manufacturer was experiencing a severe drop on toothpaste sales figures on the post-war period [citation needed]. Their ingenuous solution was to increase the diameter of the toothpaste tube outlet, hoping that their customers would still cover the length of the toothbrush with paste, therefore consuming more, unaware of the less-than-orthodox strategies of the manufacturer. Unfortunately or not, it seems to have worked.

TP (1) - Toilet paper is probably the heaven for unethical companies to try to fool their loyal customers, due to the many variables involved in the price model of this kind of good (texture, length, width, weight, etc.). First, there was the Scott versus Neve controversy here in Brazil. Both are Kimberly-Clark toilet paper brands here in Brazil and they seem [unverified] to have the same qualities. When Scott was first released, it was supposedly a less expensive option when compared to Neve. However, rolls of Neve always had 40m of TP and Scott was released with just a 20m roll option. As you may already figured out, it was not half of the price. There is a law here that will force the manufacturer to clearly state changes on the quantity on the packaging of an already-marketed product. That was not the case for new products and KC may have used that to release Scott.

TP (2) - On the other side of the spectrum, the Mirafiori toilet paper brand, made by Manikraft, had its length increased from 40m to 50m but the price didn't jump up 25%. Interesting, isn't it? Packaging costs? Tube costs? Don't think so. I actually weighted the old, 40m version and the new, 50m Mirafiori, just to find out that the new one weights almost the same as the old one (to be fair, it weights 5-10% more). Width was the same (it is regulated), but the weight of the paper was considerably reduced and you could literally feel it. Of course, they put a huge "NOW WITH 50 METERS" note on the packaging.

Voting Machine - As you may already know, I work for a large company here in Brazil. Our cafeteria is HUGE and they serve thousands of meals everyday. The cafeteria is outsourced and this French group, Sodexo is the responsible for the restaurant. Food isn't great, but this is not relevant for today's story. As part of their Service Level check, Sodexo installed an electronic voting booth on the way out of the cafeteria with the question: "How was the food today?". Great, isn't it? When I got this job, back in 2000, the voting machine was already there and it had three simple options:

BAD

FAIR

GOOD

Well, a few years later, they realized that the results were not that great and probably hired consultants to tell them how could they get better results from the voting machine, without spending much money making better food. As you could expect from good consultants, the solution was brilliant and highly effective. They added a fourth button to the voting machine, to make it look like this:

BAD

FAIR

GOOD

EXCELLENT

Why would they add the "AWFUL" button if they could add the "EXCELLENT" option and also increase their chances of getting better results? Well, that forced me to always vote on the "BAD" option, regardless of the food quality. I was still being honest I'd say 85% of the time though. And it stayed like that until the beginning of this year, when the machine was replaced by a fancy computer with a touch screen with the fifth option, "AWFUL", added. I could vote honestly again, at last! I don't really know why, but it lasted not more than a couple of months until the equipment was labeled "UNDER MAINTENANCE" and came back with the fifth "AWFUL" option removed. Now we have a fancy touch screen computer with just the "BAD", "FAIR", "GOOD" and "EXCELLENT" options again. You know what button I am pushing now.

Keep safe distance

2009-06-03T12:58:00.023-03:00

This is a flag raised by KaDeuber in her comments and I think this subject can be explored in one post here in LTTMMA.

Keeping safe distance is applicable in two major circumstances as far as I can see:

Amongst vehicles;
Among people.

Amongst vehicles

The Brazilian and the American versions of the driver's manual both contain the advice for keeping safe distance from the vehicles that surround you.

I keep safe distance from the vehicle ahead, but somehow, as KaDeuber mentioned, there is always a specific kind of driver who thinks that I am too slow to catch up with the traffic flow and insists to use that "empty" space, forcing me to step on the brakes. This kind of driver does NOT realize what "safe distance" means.

I personally follow the simple count-to-three-mississipi rule. I look to the vehicle that is in front of mine, spot a fixed reference in the road (a pole, one particular lane strip, some guard-rail, whatever) and count: one-mississippi-two-mississippi-three-mississippi. When I stop counting I must be at most right at the previously spotted fixed reference. If I have already passed by the reference when I finished counting, this means that the distance between my car and the vehicle in front of mine is not safe.

The timing rule is good because it takes into account the velocity you are developing. The velocity is calculated by dividing the variation of distance and the time spent. So, keeping the time constant (three-mississippi), the faster you are going, the farther you will be from the vehicle ahead, then you will have more space to maneuver your car if something happens.

E.g.: if you are driving at 20 mph (about 32 km/h), using the two-mississippi rule you will be about 59 ft (~18 m) of distance away from the other car; using the three-mississippi rule you will be 88 ft (~27 m) from the other car. Check the Table I below:

Velocity	two-mississippi	three-mississippi
20 mph (~32 km/h)	59 ft (~18 m)	88 ft (~27 m)
50 mph (~80 km/h)	147 ft (~45 m)	220 ft (~67 m)
80 mph (~128 km/h)	235 ft (~72 m)	350 ft (~107 m)

Table I: Distances between vehicles according to velocity, assuming that both vehicles are at the same speed.

So, for the drivers who think that there is an "empty" space between my car and the vehicle ahead, please be aware that there is no such thing as an "empty" space. That is a virtually occupied space for REAL safety reasons.

Among people

There are some annoying people that do not know that there is an invisible social delimited boundary between two individuals that are talking to each other. This kind of person can be called a close-talker according to The Seinfeld Dictionary. This site mentions an episode of Seinfeld where Jerry says: “Conversational distance, don’t you hate these people that talk to you, they talk into your mouth like you’re a clown at a drive-through”. Simply hilarious and truthfully, this Little Thing Makes Me Angry.

Here in the US, I have received some Webinar instruction regarding Business Etiquette that was included in the relocation package. The "close talker" problem must be so serious that the Webinar instructs you that you shall be at least 2-feet away from the other person in order to have a conversation.

So, for the "close talker" kind of people please, keep safe distance!

Honking will not change Newton's First Law of Motion

2009-05-31T09:43:00.021-03:00

Newton's First Law of Motion, also known as the law of inertia, states that "Every body persists in its state of being at rest or of moving uniformly straight forward, except insofar as it is compelled to change its state by force impressed."(extracted from Wikipedia)

Although Sir Isaac Newton first published his most famous work on July 5th, 1687, it seems that people who live in the 21st century just don't know about the basic physics laws.

Having said that, imagine the following scene: you are driving your car and you see nothing more than a traffic light ahead that is turning to red. The natural action to take is to slow down your vehicle and stop right behind the crosswalk. Then you just wait patiently for the green light.

When the lights turn to green, some people insist on press FIRMLY their honkers immediately, imagining that the first driver in the row is blind AND maybe has some auditive problems. That is the only logical explanation that I can think about for someone honking so fast and so loud.

And I am not saying that the second or third car in the row does that. It is usually the fourth car in the row (or beyond) that thinks that the honker is a magical device that will make all cars disappear or make them move immediately just ignoring the fact that inertia DOES exist and that each system (person + car) has its own response time.

Why can't some drivers be more patient and calm? Is such reaction really necessary?! This kind of action really makes me angry.

The driver may accept the fact that:

if he/she has an appointment, he/she shall plan to leave earlier according to the rush hour, weather problems and previously reported accidents in highways/freeways;
if he/she did planned to leave earlier, he/she shall execute it as planned;
if things didn't come out as planned, plan better next time.
if some unexpected problem happens that make he/she to be late, I shall say that it is unexpected and one shall get used to Murphy's Law.
as far as I know, blind people are not allowed to drive.
honking or buzzing will not make the physics laws vanish from the Universe. It will only create more stress and certainly increase the entropy in the system generating more chaos.

No Parking Space Parking

2007-05-19T21:02:00.008-03:00

I work for a big company here in Brazil. We have large parking lots. They are far from being the best parking lots in the world, but they can currently hold the cars from all the company's employees that want to drive their cars to work everyday.

Parking space is not really a problem. There are spaces for everybody. But sometimes you will look for a good parking space and will realize that the best you can find is still a little bit far from your entrance gate, which is also not a problem, because the company provides buses to and from the parking lots, so their valuable, yet lazy employees don't even have to walk to get to their workplaces. Quite convenient, but there is always someone to make us angry...

As I said, the parking lot has problems. It does not have decent pavement. In fact I would say it does not have pavement at all. It doesn't have delimited parking space either. Having parking spaces marked on the ground would really help, but would not solve the problem I am going to describe. The other big parking lot (on the right side of the picture above) has marked parking spaces and still has similar problems.

The little thing that makes me angry is parking where there is no parking space. People have this amazing ability of finding places to park their cars where no one is ever supposed to park. And sometimes it is so obvious that it is a wrong place that I just had to write this post.

We have lanes marked on the parking lot that are designated for pedestrians. They are clearly marked with a "pedestrian" icon all along the path. Everybody knows it is pedestrians' space. But bad parkers insist on parking there. Everyday.

Poor pedestrian, has been just ran over...

Not only on the pedestrian lane, but also in the middle of the street...

On Fridays the problem gets worse because more people drive their cars to work in order to travel to their hometowns right after work. And again, the problem is not that there is no space for them to park. They just want to park closer to the gate. And they will park wherever their car fits. WHEREVER.

For God's sake, this guy parked INSIDE the bus stop!!

The Company has tried to educate irregular drivers by leaving notices on the windshields, but that doesn't seem to help much. Applying monetary fines could help, but I am not sure they are allowed by law to do that. Maybe locking the wheels of the car, forcing them to get back inside the facility and go to a building on the other end of the property just to release the car would help... If they are minimally intelligent, they will realize it would be better to park regularly and walk a few additional hundred meters in the morning than spending more time and walking more in the afternoon when they are in a hurry to hit the road...

What hapenned to real food?

2006-04-23T21:23:00.000-03:00

This is my first food-related article on LTTMMA. Yeah, I wrote about chewing gum some weeks ago, but I really do not consider the topic "Gum in the urinal" a real culinary post... I am a kind of a food-label-addict. I have always been and I always read them all, most of the time looking for ingredients and nutrition facts. It got a bit worse when we had our first daughter that had (and still has) some food allergies and that makes us always look for the "bad" ingredients.

Then I was thinking about why engineers were introduced to the food industry. They should not. Engineers are all about reducing cost, improving processes, reducing production cycles. Sometimes, those are things we wouldn't like to imagine applied to that food-making corporation we always loved and trusted.

I'll start with mayonnaise. I can't find real mayonnaise anywhere in Brazil. It is impossible. Not a single manufacturer makes real mayonnaise here anymore. Hellmann's, a world-wide trusted brand (owned by Unilever), doesn't taste the way it used to. Because they decided to add the so-called "modified corn starch" to the recipe, to grow it at a low cost. The only modified-corn-starch-free mayonnaise I can get is Wal*Mart's Great Value mayonnaise, because it is made in Argentina. It is very good, indeed. In the US you can still find the traditional Hellmann's that they now label as "real mayonnaise". What?! You change all the recipes and now sell "real mayonnaise" at a premium price? They will even stamp "reduced fat" on the "new mayonnaise"! Great! Damn you, food engineer.

Another good example is ice cream. It also doesn't taste like it used to. I do not live in a major brazilian city and it is hard for me to find good ice cream around here. The best I can get is imported Häagen-Dazs, which is still really good (and pricey), at the local Wal*Mart. We can't get good ice cream such as Blue Bell, Ciao Bella or UDF Homemade. All we get everywhere is Kibon (Unilever), Nestlé and some other local, bad brands. They've always put hydrogenated fat on ice cream, but they are adding more and more of it each year. As you may already know, ice cream is normally sold by volume, not by weight. Surprisingly enough, year after year, the 2 liter ice cream box seems to weight a little less. And why? Because it has more fat and because it has more air bubbles. Brilliant! It now tastes like margarine, but this is not a problem, right? Damn you, food engineer.

Finally, we also used to have a decent peanut butter, called Amendocrem. It think it was made by Visconti, a fairly trusted maker. They sold it to someone else (I think it was Claybom, a margarine brand formerly owned by Unilever) that sold it to Fugini, that currently holds the brand. It is now anything but peanut butter. It has peanuts, but has tons of fat and sugar and additives. It is definitely not peanut butter when you compare it to Smucker's, for example. I could continue writing about other items, all ruined by those damn food engineers...

I think we should take all engineers out of the food industry. And, of course, keep cooks away from designing bridges, buildings and computers. Doesn't it make sense?

Bad Use of Low-Cost Postage

2006-03-18T23:20:00.000-03:00

Brazilian postal service (Correios), one of the few things run by the brazilian government that works really well, offers a low-cost postage alternative, called "carta social" (word-by-word translation would read "social letter"). The "carta social", as per the Correios website, is "a postal service offered by Correios to facilitate the access to the postal services for those from the less favoured social classes of the Brazilian population.". It has some requirements, such as the need to be always hand-written, always be addressed to and from an individual, among others, but it is not like the similar product offered by the USPS called Nonprofit Mail, which requires a formal approval from the USPS. Here, anyone can just label an envelope "carta social" and pay one cent (R$ 0.01) for the postage, as a symbolic rate. Quite fair for a company run by the government, right? The government has the obligation to offer such a service.

The problem is that there is always someone that thinks the goverment is hiding the low-cost postage from the population just because they don't want all the population to know they can send a letter for just a penny. And I think they do, in a sense. No matter how much you emphasize on the correct usage of the product, there will be a lot of guys labeling their mail as "carta social", just to save a couple of bucks, intentionally forgetting (or ignoring) the noble intention of the service offered. I am not even close of being an enthusiast of the Brazilian government, but I'll understand if they don't want everybody to know about the existence of the "carta social" at all.

After the invention of the Internet, I haven't received much personal mail. In the past, I used to receive some letters and christmas cards labeled as "carta social". From people like me, engineers, that I don't think would have their budget hurt by that extra dollar. I just used to get back to those guys and ask "Hey, do you know what "carta social" was created for?". Two answers I normally get are: "No." or "For paying just a penny for the postage.". This makes me really sad. Someone just told them that writing those two words on the front of the envelope allows them to pay just a penny for the postage. Couldn't they just tell them the whole story?!?

But what really pisses me off are those "spam" email chains that we always receive, with an intrincate conspiracy theory around the government, that they hide the low-cost postage from the people to make more money on the taxpayers and, because of that, everybody should use the "carta social" as a way to show them that the people's power cannot be denied, bla, bla, bla...

If the spam was to encourage everybody to discuss the R$ 0.55 rate for the regular mail postage, I'd be ok with them. I'd still just delete it, because I think the rate is reasonable (although slightly high), comparing to the $0.39 (about R$ 0.85 today) americans pay for first-class postage.

By the way, although I didn't pay anything to use this blog system, I could label it a "social blog post", due to its informative, non-profit nature... What do you think?

Telemarketing & Phone Soliciting

2006-03-05T18:45:00.000-03:00

Along the years I've developed some strategies to pick up phone calls. I always answer the "Who is this?" question with a "Who do you want to talk to?" question, for example. I have a caller-id box so whenever I see a number I do not recognize, I know it is either a wrong number call, a seller or a solicitor. I always help wrong number callers, if they allow me to do so (some hang up before even saying "I am sorry."). On the other hand, I never help sellers or solicitors.

Not rarely I listen to someone on the phone saying "I wanna talk to the responsible for this house". What is that supposed to mean? She (it is normally a woman on the other end, don't ask me why) doesn't even know your name or the name of the responsible for the house. But she wants to speak to "him" anyway. I used to ask "What is the subject?", but they keep saying "Are you the responsible?". I have improved my answering strategies recently and currently I am only saying "Do you happen to know the name of the responsible for this house?", invariably receiving a "No." as an answer. Then I just say "Okay. I think you don't really NEED to speak to him. *click*." Sometimes they call me back in a matter of seconds. I then yell at them and they do not call me anymore.

Some months ago, I had a call from a Citibank representative. They wanted to convince me to open a checking and/or investments account with them. I do not know how they select who they are going to call, because my financial situation shouldn't be that attractive to Citibank after all... I don't have much debt or much credit. Whatever. I don't tend to spend much time listening to those telemarketing operators, because as soon as I realize it is a call that does not interest me, I just speak out loud "I AM NOT INTERESTED, THANKS. *click*." and hang up, while the operator is still babbling on the other end. Some people wait for them to finish their part and then say that are not interested on the product or service being offered. Definitely sound more polite than my approach, but I am sorry, I am not going to waste my time being polite to someone I don't know, that is most likely not going to be polite with me after I decline the offer and hang up the phone, who is offering something I do not want. After all, they are trained (and paid for) to listen to people much ruder than me. And I don't really consider my approach rude at all. I can sleep right all night after I do this. And at the end, it saves my time and their time.

Getting back to the Citi call... After I hung up on the caller, it took about 30 seconds for them to ring me back. I used the exact same procedure, with one minor addition: "YOU HAVE JUST CALLED ME MOMENTS AGO. I AM NOT INTERESTED, THANKS. *click*.". I think it was another person calling this time. I was not sure, because it was fast, really fast. Less than one minute later, phone rings again. Guess who? Citibank! I had to use a few more words, this time, but it worked out: "THIS IS THE THIRD TIME YOU CALL ME. I ALREADY SAID I AM NOT INTERESTED. IF YOU CALL ME AGAIN I WILL BE FORCED TO FILE A FORMAL CLAIM AGAINST CITIBANK. THANKS. *click*.". No one ever called me after that. I think all three calls took me less time than if I decided to hear the entire Citi proposal, decline to it, explain why I don't want another checking account free of tariffs for an entire year, a free additional credit card, etc, etc, etc, and that I do not know anyone else they could call to offer the same thing. This last time, I am sure it was another person, because it was a female voice, instead of a male from the two previous calls. I think they just keep my number on their system, so another team member can pick my number and keep calling. They ought to be obligated to take it out from the queue as soon as the prospective client declines the offer, but looks like they don't do this to unpolite clients...

It was my glory when I received a memo from my company's top management giving explicit instructions on how to deal with phone solicitors. They were very clear: "Do not waste any time listening to solicitors. You don't need to feel bad, our Company already gives a great deal of money to charities and recognized fundraising institutions. Just politely decline and hang up the phone or, if you really want to contribute with their cause, give your home number and ask them to call you back later.". I still have that memo. I love it.

I act just like my company. If I decide to help (and I do help), I'll look for an institution and will give them some money. If I want to buy something or switch to another financial institution, I'll research and look for it, most probably ruling out those that called me in the past.

I want to make it very clear that I am not against charities or any other kind of fundraisers. I just do not agree on how they spread their cause using the telephone. I don't want to listen to them when they want me to. I want to be heard when I have something to say, in this particular case. That said, I just ask solicitors and sellers to send me letters or emails instead of calling me on the phone. If I am not interested or if I can't help, I swear I will recycle all the letters.

Running Tap While Brushing Teeth

2006-02-05T21:02:00.000-02:00

Here in Brazil people normally brush their teeth after having lunch, no matter where they are. Many even floss their teeth after meals. It is a good habit, definitely. I heard from some americans that if american people had the same oral hygiene people have here in Brazil, they would probably have much less dental care problems. I was not aware, but I assumed they have a lot of dental problems in the US since then. Well, of course, this probably doesn't apply to everybody here in Brazil, but this is how all our children are (supposedly) tought how to take care of their teeth.

It is very common to have the company's restrooms full of people brushing their teeth at 12:30p or 13:00p. And that's when this "little thing" happens. Some colleagues just can't brush their teeth without having water running from the tap they are using. They just can't help themselves. It is like this: They open the tap to use the water to make the toothpaste and the toothbrush moist, to start their brushing procedure. It makes sense and I do it myself, because this way it produces much more bubbles and foam. But I shut the tap close right after moisturizing my toothbrush. They do not. They leave the water running. Really running, at full flow. Sometimes I look at their running tap and make ugly faces and sometimes they stop the water. Some people only do it halfway, so they still have water (less water I must admit) running unnecessarily.

That's a lot of water!

The water utility company that serves our offices have put some "save water" stickers attached to the walls in our restrooms, right in front of the lavatory sinks. I don't think those water wasters are any sensitive to the stickers that states: "Fresh water: Making good use is easy. Living without it is hard.". I like those words. Just to let you know, I am not one of those eco-freaks or recycloholics, this thing just pisses me off.

There are one or two really cool online water waste calculators, but they are normaly used only to calculate how much water you're wasting by having dripping taps at home... Then I realized I should calculate the annoying-brusher-water-waste myself. For God's sake, I am an engineer, I can do this!

Bill of materials:

The Lab Setup

I timed: (a) how long I take to brush my teeth; (b) how long my tap takes to completely fill a 250 mL glass; and (c) how much time I keep the tap open and running when I brush my teeth. Results are shown below:

Time to fill 250mL glass	4.8 [s]
Time to brush	218.8 [s]
Yield	45.6 [glasses]
Total water	11.4 [L]
I keep tap open	32.0 [s]
Water I use	1.7 [L]
Wasted water	9.7 [L]

Every now and then I meet someone new with the same behaviour and because of that I estimate that at least 1% of the brazilian population have the habit of having water running while brushing. Again, estimating that only 1/10 of the brazilian population brushes three times a day, we would get to an alarming total of more than 5.35 million liters of wasted water each day (almost 2 billion liters each year).

My estimates can be inaccurate, but considering I have done the math only taking into account the brazilian population, it does not sound like a little thing and maybe shouldn't be on this blog after all...

Halfway Fastened Screw Lids

2005-10-25T22:30:00.000-02:00

Being angry because of partially closed lids may sound a little over the top. But I will try to explain on this post some catastrophic consequences (maybe not that catastrophic) of halfway fastened screw lids and why they drive me mad.

I know people that leave everything half-open. These people can't just close a single lid completely. I am not even talking about fastening the lids, I am just talking about turning them until they show some minimal resistance. Fastening the lids would also be great, but of course, without stripping the screw threads or tightening them so strongly that it would require a vise and a bench to open it up again.

Talking about tightened lids, this one is worth a parenthesis... I have at home an invention that for me, is from out of this world. I think you have all been defeated at least once by that pickles jar that, even though we have not tightened strongly, seal and jam in a way that it becomes impossible for ordinary human beings to open. Don't even mind using that little cloth, holding the jar between your knees, making weird faces, turning blue. It won't open. Period. Unless you have this little wonder that I don't even know the name. Here in Brazil they seem to be easily found in those Dollar Days stores. It is a little plastic mat (it actually feels like rubber) that allows you to easily open any screw-style lid, no matter how tightened. It is like magic. If you don't know this essential device, go get one. And if you get to know the name of this thing, please let me know.

Getting back to the unfastened lids, haven't you ever had the opportunity to try to get a sugar jar by the lid, after someone "forgetting" to close it properly? If you are lucky enough, only the lid will be on your hand and the sugar jar itself will remain over the table. However, Murphy's Law is cruel and chances are that the jar will come with the lid for just some moments, and then will fall over the table, bounce on your lap and end on the floor, scattered. Of course, this was a very nice, pricy glass jar. Was. It is now gone.

Another target of lids-non-fasteners are toothpaste tubes. In this case, some people just refuse to even put the top on the tube! If on our everyday life partially fastened lids are anoying, the result of an open toothpaste tube after that week-long trip is the famous "Colgate plug". And how can we remove the Colgate plug? Simple, just squeeze the Colgate tube. With all your strength. Until the plug pops out. Booom! Congratulations, you have just got a new work of art on your bathroom sink. (Pepper)mint conditions!

It won't hurt closing those lids right. But I don't doubt that someone will tell me that turning those lids properly will give them some repetitive strain injury. Brain strain, maybe.

Tampas mal rosqueadas

Ficar nervoso por causa de tampas mal rosqueadas ou não rosqueadas até o final pode realmente parecer um pouco de exagero. Vou tentar explicar neste post quais são as conseqüências desastrosas (ou nem tanto) de tampas rosqueadas pela metade e porque isso me irrita tanto.

Conheço pessoas que fecham tudo pela metade. Essas pessoas não chegam ao final da rosca em nenhuma tampa. Não estou nem falando de apertar as tampas, estou simplesmente falando de girar as tampas de rosca até o final, até encontrar um mínimo de resistência. Apertar as tampas um pouquinho também seria bom, mas claro, sem espanar a rosca ou sem apertar tanto até que seja necessária uma morsa na próxima abertura desse pote.

Por falar em tampas apertadas, essa vale um parêntese... Eu tenho aqui em casa uma invenção que para mim é coisa do capeta. Sabem aqueles vidros de picles, que mesmo sem termos apertado muito na hora de fechar, travam violentamente, impossibilitando sua abertura por seres humanos normais? Não adianta pegar paninho, segurar o vidro no meio dos joelhos, fazer cara feia, ficar roxo. Ele não vai abrir. A não ser que você tenha essa maravilha que eu não sei o nome, mas que parece que freqüenta as prateleiras das lojas de R$ 1,99. É uma "mantinha" de plástico (na verdade parece uma borracha), que permite que você abra facilmentequalquer tampa de rosca, por mais travada que ela esteja. É mágico. Se você não conhece, vale a pena visitar uma dessas lojas de R$ 1,99. Ah, se você descobrir o nome desse treco, me avise.

Voltando às tampas mal fechadas, você nunca teve o privilégio de tentar pegar um açucareiro pela tampa, após alguém ter "esquecido" de fechar o pote devidamente? Se você tiver muita sorte, você ficará com a tampa na mão e o pote continuará em cima da mesa. Porém, como a Lei de Murphy impera e é implacável, o pote de açúcar ficará preso à tampa por alguns instantes, para depois soltar-se e cair sobre a mesa, quicando sobre seu colo e terminando espalhando tudo pelo chão. Claro, esse era um belo açucareiro de vidro. Era. Já era.

Outro alvo dos não-fechadores-de-tampa são os tubos de creme dental. Nesse caso, algumas pessoas simplesmente recusam-se a ao menos colocar a tampa no tubo! Se no dia-a-dia as tampas mal fechadas são incômodas, o resultado de um creme dental mal fechado durante aquela semana de férias é o famoso "rolhão Colgate". E como remover o rolhão Colgate? Simples, basta apertar o tubo de Colgate. Com certa força. Até vencer o rolhão. Booom! Parabéns, você acaba de ganhar uma obra de arte de menta na pia do banheiro.

Não custa nada rosquear as tampas até o final... Mas não duvido nada que alguém venha me dizer que é para prevenir lesões por esforços repetitivos. Só se for no cérebro.

The Gum in the Urinal

2005-10-16T19:55:00.000-02:00

I've been thinking on how to start my list of little things that make me angry. It was not an easy decision, but I really think that the story of the Gum in the Urinal precisely represents the spirit of this blog.

The "gum in the urinal" problem occurs frequently in one of the public restrooms that I visit on a daily basis. I don't really know if this is a common situation or even if other readers have gone through this before, but this is one vision that immediately makes me angry.

The act of chewing gum itself is not a nice thing, but what could possibly induce one to spit the gum inside the urinal, while in use? Yes, during its normal use I assume, because it is really hard for me to believe that one would bend over an urinal only to drop the gum, although I would not doubt people's ability of performing disgusting acts.

Let's just figure it out: the guy is there doing "number 1", chewing that old and already tasteless gum and decides throwing the gum over his own urine, possibly aiming one of the holes of the device. It is not hard to also imagine the nasty grin on the face of the guy that manages to hit the center hole of the porcelain or of the guy that hits, with his urine stream, the falling piece of gum.

With luck, our buddy will flush the toilet, making the gum wobble a little bit more, but knowing that it will fatally stay inside the urinal. For those of you who want to know what chewing gums are made of, they are a mix of natural and artificial rubber-like resins, coloring agents, flavouring agents, sugars and some other chemical stuff. Nothing really healthy or nutritious. It could be called a "temporarily-tasty-rubber".

People say that it takes more than five years for the gum to degrade naturally. Then I wonder if the guy that drops the gum in the urinal imagines that someone will invariably have to take it from there - manually. I once read that passionate kisses have the capacity of disintegrating chewing gum! Maybe this is the case to suggest our buddy to fall in love with the urinal and, after throwing the gum inside it, kiss it passionately, until the little rubber is gone. What about that?

Chiclete no Mictório

Estive pensando em como começar minha lista de pequenas coisas que me aborrecem. Não foi uma decisão fácil, mas acho que o chiclete no mictório é uma das histórias que melhor representa o espírito deste blog.

Esse problema do chiclete no mictório acontece freqüentemente em um dos banheiros de uso comum que "visito" diariamente. Realmente não sei se é uma situação comum ou mesmo se outros leitores já passaram por isso, mas essa é uma das visões que conseguem me deixar indignado imediatamente.

Mascar chicletes em si já não é uma coisa muito bonita, mas o que faz com que uma pessoa cuspa o chiclete em um mictório, muito provavelmente durante seu uso? Durante seu uso normal sim, pois imagino que ninguém iria colocar a cabeça sobre um mictório somente para cuspir um chiclete, apesar de não duvidar da capacidade das pessoas em fazer coisas nojentas.

Imaginemos a cena: o cidadão fazendo o "número 1", mascando aquele chicletinho velho e já sem gosto, decide, por alguma razão, jogar a goma por cima do xixi, provavelmente mirando em um dos furinhos do dispositivo. Não é difícil imaginar também o sorriso no rosto daquele que consegue acertar o furo central do vaso ou ainda daquele que consegue acertar o chiclete, em sua trajetória de queda livre, com o jato de urina ainda em fluxo.

Com sorte, esse nosso amigo irá puxar o botão da descarga, fazendo com que a goma de mascar passeie um pouco mais pelo mictório, mas que invariavelmente irá permanecer em seu interior. Para quem tem interesse em saber do que é feita a goma de mascar, ela é uma mistura de resinas naturais e artificiais, aromatizantes, corantes, açúcar e alguns outros ingredientes. Nada que possa ser chamado de saudável ou nutritivo. É praticamente uma borracha temporariamente saborosa.

Dizem que a goma de mascar leva mais de cinco anos para se degradar naturalmente. Aí eu fico imaginando se a pessoa que cospe o chiclete no mictório, também imagina que alguém vai ter que pegar aquilo de lá - manualmente - para jogar no lixo. Li uma vez que beijos apaixonados têm a capacidade de desintegrar chicletes! Talvez fosse o caso de sugerir que o nosso colega apaixone-se pelo mictório e, após cuspir sua goma de mascar no vaso, beije-o calorosamente até que a borrachinha se desintegre. Que tal?

Little Things

2005-10-16T10:37:00.000-02:00

Ok. Today I've entered into the world of blogging. I really don't know where this is leading to, nor if I'll have enough time to create posts regularly. As you could see, I created this blog under a subject, which is "Little things that make me angry" (LTTMMA). All right, you are probably thinking that I am one of those annoying, picky persons that rage at every little thing and probably need some anger management sessions. It is possible. And most likely it is true. Anyway, the other day I was talking to some friends that it would be interesting to save my whines somewhere and since then I thought that a blog would be the perfect media for the job. I initially thought on writing this blog in English only (the one you are reading right now), but I just realized that some "little things" would be really applicable only in Brazil. At the same time, I wanted to make it available in English so that people from around the world be able to read my posts. So I decided to make this blog available in both English and Portuguese ("Pequenas coisas que me deixam nervoso"). English is not my mother tongue, so please "bear with my English". Let's see how this is going to end...

Pequenas coisas

Ok. Hoje entrei no mundo dos Blogs. Não sei aonde isso vai parar, nem se terei tempo para ficar criando posts aqui. Como podem ver, criei esse blog com um tema, que é "Pequenas coisas que me deixam nervoso". Tudo bem, provavelmente estão achando que sou um daqueles chatos que implicam com qualquer bobagem e que precisam de ajuda profissional. Pode ser. De qualquer forma, outro dia estava comentando com alguns amigos que seria interessante guardar essas minhas "implicações" e desde então imaginei que um blog poderia ser o meio ideal. Inicialmente pensei em escrever esse blog somente em inglês ("Little things that make me angry" - LTTMMA), mas percebi que algumas "pequenas coisas" seriam realmente válidas somente por aqui e ficariam sem sentido para o resto do mundo. Por outro lado, eu gostaria que pessoas de fora do Brasil pudessem eventualmente ler meus posts. Então esse blog está nascendo nas duas línguas. O inglês não é minha língua nativa, portanto, farei traduções totalmente livres e não necessariamente os posts serão simultâneos. Desculpem-me pelos eventuais erros de inglês. Vamos ver no que isso tudo vai dar...